Nope. If you’re wondering if the stomach issues improved from Monday to Tuesday, nope. Yes, I woke up ready to fight over anything and everything. The responses that people give me? Somehow, my imagination runs off with the WORST case scenario. I’ll give y’all an example.
“Why isn’t Daddy helping us with this?”
ANY of my kids on a regular basis
*straight face* See. Now, see, this is what I’m talking about. On days like today, when I’m struggling to maintain my composure, shit like that makes me think. I think baaaad too. I take it personal. It sounds simple and innocent. Some may call it playful. (It is NEVER playful but whatever to you healthy folks.) My kids say stuff like this and I hear, “Why the handicapped dude just chilling. Ain’t nothing wrong with him.” I should NOT be thinking that! It is TERRIBLE to think such mess but I do. Yesterday was tough but I swung back by sitting outside, distracting myself from the stuffy, full, gaseous feeling. It worked too. Today, my Multiple Sclerosis was waiting on that treatment and straight whooped my ass. The stress from the month long constipation makes me suddenly aware, conscious of other symptoms. Symptoms that I managed with cannabis, sage, CBD, etc reared their heads. Mind you, the symptoms have never left or stopped. My dedication to routines, habits and Gratitudes PREVENT me from tripping over what I can’t do or won’t ever be able to do. When you can’t boo boo for this long, it slowly festers into everything you do. I’m worried so much about getting over this, that I start worrying about OLD shit. Now, BOOM. Snowball of negativity.
I came to the conclusion that I must be getting dehydrated too. Constipated and dehydrated. How? Why? *shrugs* You asked so I’m gonna tell you. My belly is so swollen full, even water sits at the top like a Thanksgiving Turkey meal! Ohhhhh… People, the struggle is real in the field for da lil handicapped homie living on will! (Yup. I just freestyled that hot bar. *wink*) I’m not overreacting here either. It is hard to drink a few sips of water because I’m so full. My mouth is dry, headache coming and going, confused AF, legs trembling like a mug even when I’m sitting. Yeeeees, I’m drinking water as I blog this entry! Well, trying, slowly. I’m always claiming that I don’t trust Western medicine and I don’t buuuuuut… It’s time now. I went and scooped the infamous bottle of magnesium citrate. Something finna shake out so I can go back to running Daddy’s Academy of Gratitude.
This was the first step to clearing my head. I agreed to the students (dem kids) helping in the yard early. While they weeded out the flowerbeds, rinsed cars and washed porches, I sat in relative peace meditating and yoga’ing. Yes ma’am, outside I sat to recapture the glory of yesterday. I keep various YouTube playlists for tough days and this required ol’ skool, chopped-N-screwed, R&B. I’m talking about Mariah Carey->Brandy->Badu->New Edition->Keith Sweat->Tevin Campbell->Whitney. I’m using it ALL. The kids and wife jammed along, doing their yardwork and plotting on puppy names. (Naw. I ain’t support that discussion. *rolls eyes* My kids haven’t improved THAT much but again, whatever because I know I’m sourpussing around.) The hour away from responsibility gave me enough of a breather to collect myself, redirect some energy and calm down.
We decided to treat the students (dem kids). Exactly! You already know a brother broke so we leaned on the free Taco Bell offer. Several times. Heeeell yeah BRO! By the time we made it back home from lunch hunting, they were full on free tacos. That was an added bonus because I’m alone with the kids tomorrow and I’m pretty sure, I will NOT be taking them anywhere. Free tacos today and tomorrow is the school provided lunchbox.
About that schoolwork…
YAAAAAAAS! Let me share this good story. The Mrs. and I burned off early in the AM, waaaay before Academy opened. Our intention was run by the store for some mulch real quick. Three hours later, we returned to the crib with the plans for yardwork. The awesome thing? The major deal? The special thang that made me smile and took my mind off the personal plumbing issues? Academy starts at 9am. No exceptions, no excuses, no bullshit. Well, at about 9:15am, I started checking the kids to make sure they were up. We have the security cameras around the outside and inside of the house so checking the kids is simple as looking at the phone, going through camera, after camera until you see where they are. Y’ALL. DEM MUGS WERE AT REGULAR POSITIONS DOING THEIR SCHOOL ASSIGNMENTS AND WORK! Noooooo. I am not lying either! Without an adult, without a text reminder, without a vocal threat, the kids were all doing their schoolwork, on time. *sniff, single tear* That shit made Daddy so proud that I forgot my tummy issues for 30min. It all came rushing back when I cannabi-cated, laughed at somebody’s joke and drank two sips of water. Ugh. Full right away. Discomfort on fleek. (Does anybody still say fleek?) Maaaaaaan, dem kids doing what they’re supposed to do, expected to do, made me reconsider their puppy idea. I didn’t tell THEM that I was coming around but I definitely am.
Who’s Cooking Tonight?
Our latest family project, inspired by the quarantine, is Who’s Cooking Tonight? In our little, new, NEW classic, Mother Sweet preps meals for the week. Every evening, we draw names for who will cook that night and what they will cook. There is no whining, complaining your way out of it. First up was kid #4 and she won broccoli-potato-cheese soup. She loved it. The soup was good and not a single leftover drop for tomorrow.
