Video games, Marriage & Multiple Sclerosis: Madden 20

How Video games, Marriage & Multiple Sclerosis: Madden 20 have affected me.
Random stats because I KNOW some folks love them. *wink*

Yes. *stands tall at podium* I am a reformed video game fanatic. I stopped for 8 whole months, August 2019 – March 2020 and set specific goals that I had to achieve before I came back. Actually, I was DEEP AF into changing my mindset, solidifying my routines and BEING better. I left the video game world and all arenas of competitive online play. During that 8 month hiatus, I wrote my self help ebook (If you can’t GET better, BE better) and my first short story {Da G.O.A.T (Gangsta of All Teachers)}. I started and STILL meditate and yoga every single day. Audiobooks and self-improvement podcasts became a staple of my diet (Remember, diet is everything you intake, food, music, media, people, books, radio, shall I go on?). Off of videogames, I was more aware than ever with my kids, folks’ body language, just more freaking present.

Why go back then? Why even start back up? The Mrs. and I doing good, spending QT, kids watching movies with parents, we rocking games of Uno… Why on earth would I want to go back to videogaming?! *straight face* Dawg, I missed it and didn’t even know I missed it. It started with the kids’ TV going out. That led to my son bringing his PS4 to the living room TV. One day, I saw him playing MY favorite game of all time, Skyrim. (Ohhhhhh my. Dragons, FULL character customization, magic, swords, vampires, werewolves, assassins, YOU can marry/build your custom home… Wow. *heart boner*)


When I played a little minute, my brother saw and told me Madden 20 was on sale for 7-days due to quarantine. Normally, it is $60 so I scooped it and… I’m back playing video games but things have changed.

Once upon a time, my wife thought I played video games too much.

*sad face* Number one, I am QUITE into games that allow full customization of your character. It was always a major component of me playing the video game, character be black. Now, in my current incarnation as da lil handicapped homie, it is even MORE important. Sis. *puts hands on hips and rolls eyes* I am already handicapped and losing more and more of my independence so I DAMN SHO wanna be a WALKING, black person in the video game. I mean, I’ll be a handicapped, BLACK person but I gotta be black homie. Cool games like Witcher III, I thought were borderline awesome? I won’t even play it now because the character is a white guy with long, white hair. Skyrim tho? *BIG smile* That mug is juuuuuust fine. Skyrim and the Elder Scrolls RPGs. My neighbor and I were talking about video games and he recommended The Outer Worlds because of the character creation stuff. (Cool guy, for real.)

Before I stopped video games to focus on OTHER stuff, my potna POTNA and I played Destiny. It’s a shooter game where you choose a character race, skin color and take off saving the universe. Each of the races has special powers and abilities. Maaaaaaan, we would play THAT mug for hours together. Since I’ve returned, my potna don’t play video games no mo. *sighs* I don’t wanna play Destiny, my second favorite video game without him so I don’t. *shrugs* Yoo. I have multiple sclerosis and have had to say good bye to walking, driving, standing to pee, eating MEAT, etc. I’ve learned to get over things and move on. I miss TF out playing Destiny, saving everyone and such but I gotta find something else.

Kid #2: “Daddy. Just play Madden with Uncle and your old friends. Are you scared of getting beat down to the ground or something?”

Me: “Noooooo. *curls top lip and bucks* I just don’t want to get trapped trying to practice, improve my skills and by the time I’m any good, Madden 21 drops.”

Kid #2: “SO! Then get good at Madden 21 and start on time.”

Wife: “YOU might as well because you wrote your books. I’m proud of YOU. Gon play Madden dude.” *shrugs AND winks*

This is NOT my son and I. My son ain’t STUDDEN me and I TRY to play with him!

When my WIFE supported me back on video games, I really felt empowered. I had already bought the game and was playing a little. With HER blessing, shhhhiiiiiiiiiid, ya boi did his thing and jumped into his old game with his old cronies!

The culprit…

I’ve been playing Madden 20, SuckaFree online franchise with 14 users, and getting DEMOLISHED! *ROTFLMAO!!!!!!* These dudes whoop my ass up and down the virtual field. I joined as the TN Titans in year 2028. Back in the day, I chose a team based on the players/talent on the team. Things have changed now. I have this internal storyline, STUCK, and not so concerned with players, ratings, speed or even winning for that matter. In my head, I’m the handicapped coach, MuthaFugga King. (The name? I don’t know. I’ve always liked Jamie Foxx in Horrible Bosses.) Well, Coach King is crazy into his players developing as ‘Agents of Gratitude’ in their off-field lives so that they enter football games, communities and especially their homes as REAL MEN OF CHARACTER. All that mess is supposed to translate into on-field wins but it is going sooooo slow. We went 1 win, 15 losses in his first season. 4-12 in his second season and are still the WORST team in the SuckaFree franchise. Yup, of all 14, I’m at the bottom.

SuckaFree franchise rules are ambiguous to easy adjusting to cheaters/cheezers. *raises eyebrows*

At the bottom and enjoying it! Well, of course, I’d rather to come in wrecking and killing THEM but whatever. I talk trash to other users about how MY players serving the community, earning community awards and the “plan is working”. *LOL* The OTHER users don’t find it as funny as I do. Here they are big texting about “stomping ass” and “busting heads wiiiiide open” while I’m saying shit like, “My QB learning. Coach has him practicing with LBs to make a point to the team about togetherness.” Nope, they do NOT find it normal and often ask what am I talking about. That is how things have changed and are changing. I’ve redefined “winning” and “fun” with the video game. It has become much more personal yet somehow, not as dire. The game difficulty doesn’t upset me near as much as it used because I’ve redefined “winning” and “fun”. Losing to OTHER users doesn’t sour my mood because I’ve redefined “winning” and “fun”. If there is something important to do on the video game (Remember, I’m playing with 14 users/people), I’m not tripping and accept losses, mess-ups, slow progress because… You guessed it; I’ve redefined “winning” and “fun”.

Link to BENEFITS of video games and MS: 6 Ways Video Games may benefit MS

Meanwhile, I’m rocking and rolling with QT, blogging, writing, hanging out my kids and everything. Sure, I’m losing and no real threat to win a championship or anything but playing the Madden 20 with those friends has filled a void. It’s Quarantine Season so ain’t nobody just kicking with the handicapped dude. There is nowhere really for a dude, like me, to just post up and hang out because with MY chronic cough issues and consistent smoking, coronavirus is a FEAR. Playing with them brings people to me. I’m at the crib doing my thing, helping others, telling stories and HAPPILY losing my ass off at video games.

PSN tag: Once-FutureKing. It’s a play on King Arthur and my grandmother’s maiden name. *Respect*

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